Aspire to be easy to Shepherd

We have implemented a Shepherding Plan here at Creekside, which is a systematized way to ensure that every member of our church has a designated “shepherd.” This is an elder who has been installed by the church for the care of the church. Every member’s “elder” serves as a direct contact point for the church. The hope is that periodic conversations can be undertaken and that elder can provide spiritual help to the one he is overseeing.

However, some sheep are easier to oversee than others. Anyone who has had more than one dog knows this. Some dogs come when you call; some dogs run the other way. Yet most dogs are good dogs, they simply need a little training!

In attempt to maybe give an insider’s perspective, here are a few things that would make every member “easier to shepherd.”

1) Attend the corporate gathering as often as you are able.

The first sign of spiritual problems is often not some horrible sin, but a subtle one. People who stop coming to church regularly will often have other spiritual problems crop up over time. I often have people come to church, sleep through my sermon, and then apologize to me after the sermon for sleeping through the sermon. I appreciate the honesty, but I would rather have someone sleep through the sermon from time to time than have someone simply sleep in. Now if you sleep through every sermon, we might need to have a chat. Maybe my sermons could be shorter. But I have confidence that you were at least present. You’re not attending a different church. You’re not simply sleeping in. A sheep you can see is a sheep that has the potential to be shepherded.

2) When you miss church, let your pastor or someone else know where you were.

If you were on vacation, simply shoot a text and say, “We’re out of town this week.” If you’re sick, let someone know (they’ll probably bring you food if the right people find out). If you slept in, just say it. I think most pastors would rather be met with the honesty that one of their congregants slept in or got in a big fight with their spouse than to simply wonder why so-and-so wasn’t here this week. Marital issues and sleeping in are human conditions. We can handle that. Unexplained absences often cause spiritually attuned pastors to worry. Sometimes there is good reason for worry. Sometimes there isn’t.

3) If there is an issue, talk to the person who is able to address it.

If you have an issue with one of the deacons, it is probably best to go to him about it rather than someone else. If he has done something sinful, he probably needs to ask for your forgiveness. However, if he doesn’t know what he’s done, it’s unlikely he’ll respond accordingly. People cannot read your mind, even if you are both Christians!

If you have an issue with your pastor and you want to talk to him about it, consider scheduling a meeting with him in the following manner:

“Hi Pastor __________, I noticed this past week in your sermon you said that Baptism was not necessary for salvation. I am confused why we require members to be baptized if it is not necessary? Do you have time this week where we could talk about this?”

This helps pastors immensely because he knows 1) What the issue is, 2) who is coming to him with the issue, and 3) how to respond to the issue.

Consider a different manner

“Hi, Pastor __________, I lot of people have a problem with what you’ve been teaching on Sunday. Can we talk about it?”

The first situation was clear and personal. The second one is communal and obscure. As a rule of thumb, if someone won’t attach their name to their criticism, I don’t give it much thought. Additionally, this second situation gives no clarity as to what the actual problem is or how it can be solved.

If I know one of my members has a particularly difficult time with a doctrine or has had a difficult experience, I am able to respond in such a way as to pastor them. If I don’t know these things, well, I don’t know what I don’t know. Consider how this posture can make it easier for your pastor to watch over you.

4) Pursue relationships in the church.

If the only person you know in the church is the person you come with each week, then it will be unlikely that you’ll be pastored very well. Church membership is a group project. The pastor might play an important role in the project, but it takes many members to be the body of Christ. A network of relationships makes the flock of God easier to pastor.

If you don’t pursue a relationship with anyone in the church, it is unlikely you will remain there for very long. Also, the point of church is not to “have a worship experience” but to “belong to a body.” It is amazing how people who pursue relationships with other church members are much easier to pastor than those who simply remain on the fringes.

5) Don’t make a big deal about something that isn’t clearly deduced from biblical principles.

If the pastor recommends something that is clearly unbiblical, then you have every right to make it known that he is recommending something unbiblical. However, I have yet to hear of the person who leaves the church because of clear doctrinal reasons. People will make all kinds of theological excuses to stay in a church, yet leave when the music isn’t the style they like.

I’m a musician by training. Believe me, music never satisfies everyone. It’s always too fast. Or too slow. Or too repetitive. Or too high. Or too low. Or too loud. Or too soft. Or the lyrics are weak. Or the lyrics aren’t simple enough. Or there isn’t an organ. Or there is an organ. Or the worship band has too many people. Or the worship band doesn’t have enough people. Or the lead singer doesn’t sound like Johnny Cash. Or the lead singer sounds too much like Johnny Cash. You catch my drift.

You have the opportunity to do something radical in your church, and it is to “consider others as more significant than yourselves (Phil. 2:3).” It is actually much easier to complain about things than it is to commit to get along in the church. And I think Jesus wants us to get along. That’s the feeling I get from the New Testament.

These 5 things won’t change your life, more than likely. At least, not overnight. But I think that if you commit to abiding by these principles and attempting to show commitment to the church in these ways, your pastors will have an easier time pastoring you, and I think you’ll be better in the long run for it.

Recall Hebrews 13:17 (ESV)

17 Obey your leaders and submit to them, for they are keeping watch over your souls, as those who will have to give an account. Let them do this with joy and not with groaning, for that would be of no advantage to you.

Do you want shepherding to be an advantage to you? Help the pastors pastor you.